Failure, A Reflection

The first half of 2016 was riddled with mistakes, all of them mine.

Too many commitments, too much pressure (mostly self-induced), and expecting too much from one person. I learned that I am human, and a human being (even someone with the determination to forge through just about anything) needs time to take care of basic needs such as eating and sleeping.

And even the most work-focused individual needs to set aside some downtime for fun.

 

All work and no play make a boring writer.

In all my years at the keyboard (or pen) I’ve never had a lack of ideas, I’ve never been unable to make progress on a project – even shitty progress is still progress. But working two jobs while raising three kids, writing and not taking the time to rest – or get a decent night’s sleep – has taught me that even *I* can hit a wall.

I didn’t want to write. Well, that’s not exactly true. I wanted to write, I was just so exhausted I’d stare at my computer/notepad/tablet until I fell asleep. Or I’d toss and turn if I tried to actually get eight hours of shut-eye worrying about the fact that I wasn’t writing, that I was falling behind on my deadlines, that I was (gasp!) failing.

So I failed.

I made mistakes at work, I made mistakes parenting, I dropped writing projects and fell behind on every single goal for 2016. Every. Single. One.

I failed, and I failed spectacularly.

And for a perfectionist such as myself, it was the stuff of nightmares.

But wait, was it really?

No. I survived.

And I dusted myself off and got right back up again. This time with a more realistic picture of what I can (and can’t) do. I am only human. I push myself – a lot – but there is a limit to how far I can stretch the twenty-four hours all of us are given.

Will I make more mistakes? Definitely. But I won’t let that stop me.

“Failure is so important. We speak about success all the time. It is the ability to resist failure or use failure that often leads to greater success. I’ve met people who don’t want to try for fear of failing.” – J.K. Rowling

Don’t let your failure – or the fear of failure – stop you.

Y’all knew I’d stick a #Supernatural meme in here somewhere, right?